Tuesday, July 14, 2009

moments I am missing

please click on photo to see this scene up close.

These are the irreplaceable moments in life. Sometimes you see them and sometimes they go by unnoticed. I am glad I have a picture of this one to remind me of the happy memories our kitty Sylvia gave us while she was with us.
Last night as we talked about another day without Sylvia, I mentioned how I found different moments through out the day harder to bear, pulling into the driveway being one of them. Sylvia was always there waiting for us. She would see us driving down the block and would dart across the yard to greet us. I told my son and husband I realized now that Sylvia is gone, it's as if a bright light is missing. We all agreed how much we all looked forward to seeing her everyday, her presence just seemed to make life a little brighter.

Today I am missing Sylvia the most. In her younger days she used to stay outside all night. This last year she had been coming in at night when I would let Priscilla out for her last pee. The last two nights just as Priscilla was going out the door, she hesitated as if she was waiting for Sylvia to come inside. That was their little ritual. Priscilla would let Sylvia into the house before she would go out to pee. She loved to sniff Sylvia as she entered the house and it always amazed me that Sylvia would let her. In fact she seemed to saunter in slowly as if she was saying, "Sniff away little Priscilla, take your time, no need to rush."
But last night Priscilla looked out into the night hesitating, like she was confused, her world had gone awry and she wasn't able to figure it out.
This morning I let Priscilla out at 6AM. Usually Sylvia and she would go out the door together. As I opened the door it was like being met with a huge gaping hole. Even though our son was sleeping upstairs, my husband was getting ready for work, Priscilla was standing beside me and the birds and squirrels were busy doing their morning thing, everything seemed completely empty. It was as if a bright light was indeed missing.


Ian France said...

Beautiful post. I am so sorry for your loss, it seems that Sylvia was indeed a very special cat.

Maggie and Mitch said...

We are so very sorry to hear about Sylvia. What a pretty kitty she was! We're thinking of you.

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Andrea said...

A very emotional post. It must have been difficult. Thank you for putting your feelings into words. We forget how dear those small moments are to us when they are happening. Hugs, A~

MmeBenaut said...

Oh Lily, I do so feel for you and of course it is the ordinary routines during which you will miss Sylvia the most. How many hundreds of times you must have stood in that same position, watching your girl saunter past Priscilla. I am tempted to suggest that you get a kitten but I know that it is a long term commitment. Do you think you might get another cat? Life is just better with a cat.

MyMaracas said...

How well I know that feeling of missing light, lost love, the world gone awry. I'm so sorry for your loss.