Saturday, December 1, 2007

It's more scary NOT changing...

Your future is more scary when you are not changing & growing. It's like enslaving yourself, keeping yourself from truly experiencing what life has to offer." This is what I heard my weight watchers leader say this morning. She also said that some reasons why people don't change are because they are still holding onto negative thought, thinking they don't believe in themselves, they don't deserve it, or they don't feel they can achieve whatever it is they are trying to achieve.

Some things in life tend to come easier to me than others. When I think about it, it's kind of lame of me to just pursue those goals in life that are easier. Two months ago when I started running, I hated it. It was hard. It took me 20 minutes to run 1.6 miles & I had a 5 minute break in the middle of it. It is now eight weeks later & yesterday afternoon I ran 3.2 miles in 36 minutes & then walked .8 miles to cool off. (OK, so maybe it was more like jogging!) That small success didn't happen overnight & it wasn't easy to achieve, but I'm doing it. The point is, achieving something I never imagined I could do feels so good- & those endorphins are a major plus!

I know I tend to think I just won't be able to achieve my total weight loss goal, so why bother? I have more important things to do I say, (in my head) convincing myself this is true. Right now I'm thinking, what could be more important than my health or God forbid, my self esteem?

I remember the one other time I was in weight watchers I lost 23 lbs. For about 8 weeks after that achievement I couldn't "seem" to lose anymore weight. I developed a bad attitude making up reasons not to go back to WW- like I couldn't pay for it anymore if I wasn't going to lose anymore, blah, blah, blah, blah. So I stopped going to WW & gradually I gained all but 11.6 pounds back. I never got to feel what it was like to achieve that goal.

This morning when I got on the scale at the WW meeting I showed a total weight loss of 3.8 pounds since November 8, 2007. It may not sound like a lot, but it is huge to me. I feel like every ounce of those 3.8 pounds were worked off of me for good.
Thank you God for this new found willingness to change & grow. I am really looking forward to achieving another difficult goal. It isn't easy & it may take awhile but I know for me it will be an amazing accomplishment.

This picture is a good reason for me to continue to take care of myself...












1 comment:

Qausi-Mom said...

Diana the picture is too small I clicked but it did not popup bigger. Could you send it to me? I needed this entire entry, I am mulling over a big change here too and well it is going to be hard. I want to do it but it would be so much easier not too. I think I am definitely going to do it;)
Thanks Di!