I thought I would pick Ian up a little early from school yesterday so he could prepare himself for his audition. I didn't want to be rushed. I wanted him to have some moments to himself to shed his school day and try and relax. Plus he had to practice his songs a bit.
As he sat next to me in the small space of our car and started to practice I started to worry. I wouldn't say he sounded bad, but he just didn't sound like himself. His voice sounded tired. Panis Angelicus always sounds pretty when he sings it. As angelic as Ian sounded yesterday, it sounded like something was missing. Was it his energy? I couldn't put my finger on it. The principal at his school was telling me all the kids have been overtired lately. They think it's the allergy inducing air tiring everybody out. Ian's DR said last week that this Spring in NY has been the worst allergy season he has ever seen. Great- I thought, the timing for this audition is just not good at all.
We had to wait for another student to finish his audition. I started talking with God. I know when I am talking with him because I start to feel an inner calm. I start getting reasonable thoughts in my brain that I don't believe would be there in such circumstances unless God was there to comfort me. Like for instance, I started to realize that you know, whatever is going to happen is going to happen. Why not just let God's will unfold? I prayed a simple prayer taking me out of my own head asking God to please let his will be done, bless Ian and the other people involved with the auditions today. Help them all to follow your path Lord. This always makes me feel noble when I pray for all those involved. I think God likes it when I start to think of others and what they may be going through in our shared set of circumstances. It always makes me feel better when I remember to do this.
Yes, this teacher is about to decide something important for our son, but you know what? In actuality God is the one making the decisions through this wonderful teacher. ( I could tell he is wonderful because he is so into it.) In other words, if Ian doesn't get in the glee club, that means he's not suppose to be there.
As I was waiting for my son as he auditioned for the glee club at the high school he will be attending in the Fall, I was completely overcome with emotion. It happened all at once, it was worse than getting choked up. It felt like that type of soul wrenching feeling when you just know without a doubt that God gives us many gifts. Like when you see our creator busy looking for opportunities to let his light shine through us so completely so the world can feel his presence. I believe God created music for precisely this reason. It breaks down all barriers, it's sole purpose being to unite all of us.
I turned to face the row of lockers to avoid eye contact with two students passing by.
Outside the open doorway we could clearly hear Ian in the middle of singing Hey Jude. The students stopped in their tracks one asking the other, "Who is that, hey do you know him?" Watching this my happy tears turned to laughter thinking to myself, I can't wait to tell Ian about this!
Towards the end of his audition I started to get the feeling the teacher was making it a lengthy one so that he could continue to hear him sing. To make a long story short Ian got in the glee club.
The only problem now is he has to decide between either the glee club or the orchestra. The teacher told him to follow his heart.
OK God, it's me again...